We all need the words. With accurate words we can clearly communicate our experiences to others, find others who share our experience, and have others understand what we’re going through. Rarely has, “I’m fine,” in response to, “How are you doing?” transmitted any useful information. Is it time to banish these banal responses?
Word Jail.
When I was teaching writing, we had a few words that were confined to “word jail” because they didn’t add any depth of meaning to the students’ writing. “Good, bad, happy, sad” were among the worst offenders. Teachers encouraged the students to use more expressive synonyms in their work.
Emotional Learning
Despite our attempts to expand vocabulary in writing, we rarely worked on expanding it in oral communication. It seems strange to me now that we didn’t start with talking, and then move to writing. In the last several years of teaching, with the extra push to include more mental health supports during the pandemic, we started using feelings charts. We develop vocabulary for the different intensities of an emotion such as, fear (from discomfort, to unease, to scared, to panic). This was new information for me, and I’m guessing, for many other adults outside the counselling professions.
Expanding Your Feelings Vocabulary
Imagine the power of being able to accurately describe your feelings to others. This is where a feelings wheel is a very useful tool for children and adults alike. Instead of simply saying, “I feel angry,” a person can find anger in the middle of the wheel and then look at the second and third levels of the circle, and identify which type of anger feels most appropriate to them. Are they feeling jealous, irritable, envious, resentful? There are so many choices and each one expresses a different experience.
Empowering
Once an emotion has been accurately labelled, the person probably has a pretty clear reason for their choice of that particular type of anger. Now they know more about themselves, and they can communicate their experience more clearly to others. Accurate words are powerful tools.
If you’ve never tried using a feelings wheel, give it a spin. Comment below with your feedback.
Retired, And Now What? 