The Healing Of Romance

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Back when I taught kindergarten, I’d frequently spend Saturday gathering picture books from my local library to support the unit we were working on. Then, I’d stand at the checkout desk with my arms full of volcano, or bear, picture books waiting my turn behind an older woman. Inevitably, she’d have a huge stack of romance novels. Each time, the women were different but the piles of romance novels were typical. I was a serious, mystery novel reader at the time, and I had all sorts of disparaging thoughts about romance: poorly written, formulaic, predictable and boring. Sadly, I applied those thoughts to the older women who read them too.  Now, as an older woman who recently began bingeing romance novels, I need to swallow my pride and concede that I was wrong, and that they knew something that I didn’t.  

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The Loss Of Fiction

I know, it’s ironic that a mystery reader, of all genres, would belittle romance for being formulaic.  There’s nothing as predictable as a detective, crime, suspects and clues, all neatly resolved by the end of the book!  But as my life got trickier, as I burnt out at work during the pandemic, I found that I couldn’t read at all. Nothing. I didn’t have the focus to hold the plot points, or the interest in puzzling out the mystery. 

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In time, I managed to skim informational books that could be digested one random chapter at a time with no need to remember what was read a few days ago. But, fiction was lost to me for years. The thick, mystery novels from some of my favourite authors that I purchased before 2020, still sit gathering dust. The themes are gritty and realistic with tragic murders and flawed characters. I used to love this stuff, but I can’t handle the suspense and the chance of a beloved character getting brutally slain. 

The Joy Of Re-discovering Fiction

I really missed being drawn into a fictional world and being able to escape day to day stresses by curling up with a book. Because, there’s been a lot of media attention on romance* lately, on a whim, I decided to try a romance novel. I guiltily downloaded a popular title from the library. I thought my brain might manage what I still expected were easy-reads. I was guaranteed a happy ending, hopefully without any brutal murders. 

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Well, surprise-surprise, I’m hooked on romance novels. It turns out that I love a predictable story arc without the bloodshed. (Who knew?)

And yet romantic fiction handles big themes: chronic illness, global warming, divorce, death, betrayal and despair. Depression, anxiety and PTSD often appear – trauma, almost always. Pain, too.*

There are still relevant themes. But, unlike real life, a romance story can end at a happy point in the character’s journey. It’s satisfying to see the joy in the characters’ lives. It’s calming to my nervous system.  I find that I’m once again able to hold multiple plot points as I read, and enjoy the character development. I’ve found reading again and it’s wonderful!

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So, if you’re a young teacher at the public library this weekend, getting books for your class, smile at the older woman as she scans piles of romance novels at the checkout. She might be you in a few years, or maybe, she already is?

Have your reading tastes changed significantly over the years? Comment below.


*https://www.theguardian.com/books/2025/dec/21/not-just-love-actually-why-romance-fiction-is-booming


Caroline@retiredandnowwhat.ca's avatar

By Caroline@retiredandnowwhat.ca

I'm a life coach discovering the opportunities and growth in midlife and beyond.

3 comments

  1. For years, I read very little because the pressures of work and family didn’t afford me the luxury of time to read. I have been loving reading more in recent years. Interestingly, I used to read romance novels when I was younger but now I love thrillers and mysteries. Just the opposite of you!

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      1. And there we agree, Caroline. I am not a fan of science fiction or fantasy. I read the first Harry Potter book when my daughter Laura was reading the series. I just couldn’t get into it. And science fiction doesn’t appeal at all.

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