How much space do you take up in the world? I am staying small. It’s a choice. After three years of the pandemic telling me to keep my world small to stay safe (remain home, avoid others), I’ve found that it’s become my normal state. But unless there’s a pandemic, a war, or a lion… Continue reading Going BIG
Category: Emotional journey
The Un-Becoming
Am I becoming a new me or just un-becoming the old me? It’s a matter of perspective. Is the path forward after retirement a time to gather new resources and skills and roles, or is it a time to take all that I am now and edit it until I find my true self? Either… Continue reading The Un-Becoming
Choosing Solutions And Hope
What you focus on, is what you will find. I’m a believer in focusing on solutions rather than problems. I see the problems but I tend to look around for ways to address them rather than look for more problems. Mindset has a lot to do with whether we find solutions or just unearth the… Continue reading Choosing Solutions And Hope
Can’t Avoid Triggers
I recognize when my body goes into a stress response: tight jaw, overheating, nerves all a-buzz. I’ve spent time watching my body to recognize these physical responses. I’ve also dedicated a lot of time to journalling over that past six months. It’s helped me to identify four specific situations that provoke a stress response in… Continue reading Can’t Avoid Triggers
That “Open Hamster Cage” Feeling
“How are you liking retirement?” asked a friend the other day. I still find it so hard to answer that question, even after 11 months. I feel a combination of disbelief and guilt. Disbelief, that time has passed and I’m actually retired and not just taking a pause from work. Guilt, about being able to… Continue reading That “Open Hamster Cage” Feeling
The Selfishness Of Retiring, The Possibility of Volunteering
I made my decision to retire almost a year ago. At the time I gave myself an arbitrary amount of time to flounder: a year. I told myself that I would take the first year to recover, to explore and to relax. As my first year anniversary approaches, I wonder if continuing to stay retired… Continue reading The Selfishness Of Retiring, The Possibility of Volunteering
Out Of My Control
It’s very difficult to let go of control. As a teacher, I felt the pressure to “control my class” which really meant keeping them quiet and engaged. I never quite managed the peaceful part of that. I preferred to keep my students noisy and engaged. However, there are times that I have had to acknowledge… Continue reading Out Of My Control
Letting Go Of Worries About Important Tasks
There are things that are urgent and important. I will do those immediately. But then, there are things that are not urgent but important, like taxes and medical tests. I will delay those things as long as possible. I don’t like to do them and I don’t want to face them. So, I play the… Continue reading Letting Go Of Worries About Important Tasks
Do What Scares You
It’s easy to become complacent and settle when you retire. You get pushed along by the rhythm of the day, and suddenly a week, a month and a season has rolled by. I could feel it happening to me and I didn’t like it. In an attempt to grow, I chose to do something that… Continue reading Do What Scares You
A Grey Blob Day
Waking up to see yet another grey sky on a Monday morning is not an inspiring sight. I’m an emotional dresser and I choose clothes that reflect how I’m feeling on the inside. Today, it was a grey blob. It wasn’t until a caught sight of myself in the mirror that I realized what I’d… Continue reading A Grey Blob Day
Retired, And Now What? 